That awkward moment when my blog is ignored by everyone!
Maybe if I start offering cake things will be different……
so there was a bug in my room so i got my mom to kill it because i hate bugs and then she was like
"you have to learn to kill bugs for your girlfriend"
and i was like
"ill get my boyfriend to do it"
and thats how i came out to my mom
when my dad was in college he had a friend who told a girl he’d take her on a date unlike any other she’d ever been on and so he took her to the supermarket to watch the lobsters fighting in the lobster tank
they’re married now
anytime a guy says “that’s what she said” always reply with “not to you”
"you are what you eat" so i guess i’m human